Twisting in the wind

There is a twister coming up, and its spinning is going to affect every single person in this country. I refer to the pretzel twisting. This pretzel twisting has actually already started. It started the day the extreme court agreed to hear the Colorado ballot case.

As I’ve mentioned before, I do not believe the court will uphold Colorado’s leaving Trump off the ballot, although one never knows. However, any Justice who DOES decide in Trump’s favor will have a problem on their hands.

And they will twist themselves into pretzels to come up with a solution to that problem — hence the pretzel dance. You see, the text of section 3 of the Fourteenth is plain as day. So the hapless court — if they do rule against Colorado — have quite a task on their hands. They will have to twist as never before, molding themselves into pretzels to try to justify that which is unjustifiable.

Let’s take a look at a few Justices who will become pretzels to try to make their rulings work. Let’s start with Brett Kavanaugh. For the beer aficionado, being taken seriously, as I said in another article, is what he wants. And Trump’s insane attorney did not help matters when she basically announced on television that Kavanaugh owes Donald Trump.

So if Brett DOES rule for Trump, I’d expect a HUGE pretzel twist. I’d expect yet another of Kavanaugh’s apologetic rulings if he bothers to write anything at all. While Brett is twisting, yet another Justice will be joining him in this most exclusive dance. That Justice is John Roberts. Roberts likely hates what the court has become because it tarnishes his legacy.

As many great legal minds have said, Roberts will likely want a unanimous verdict. But how to get one when he’s working with sociopaths? He will try, though! Chief Justice Roberts will also be twisting himself into a pretzel trying to keep order in the court and will fight for a unanimous verdict no matter what that verdict might be.

Moving on, we come to Clarence Thomas. Now, Thomas has been asked to recuse himself. He will not do it. But Clarence HATES being in the news. If he does not recuse, that’s all we’ll be hearing about. So I imagine Thomas will be looking for new ways to jump into the twisting pretzel game himself to try to look as objective as possible.

But when it comes to twisting in the wind, NOBODY but nobody can beat Neil Gorsuch, whom the Colorado Supreme Court actually QUOTED as saying in a previous ruling that states should have the individual powers to decide for themselves who are on the ballot.

How on earth can Gorsuch get away from his own words? This will be the biggest, the mightiest pretzel dance of any court justice ever. So the hapless court, for a while anyway, until this thing is resolved, will be a bunch of twisting pretzels, all desperately trying to find a way to come out of this looking good.