Solving Judge Cannon

Get ready for the onslaught. We’ve all heard from the MAGA crowd how these most recent federal charges against the twice-impeached, twice-indicted, sexual predator and disgraced ex-president are part of a ”rigged system” and nothing but a “witch hunt.” We know those claims are lies because Trump was indicted by a grand jury of his peers, not a witch hunt. And what kind of “rigged” system would assign Aileen Cannon the task of adjudicating and (gulp) sentencing Donald Trump?

Now get ready for the claim that “civilized” nations don’t send harmless, elderly men to prison. Yes they do, and it happened right here in jolly old England.

Many of you know who Rolf Harris is without actually knowing his name. If you’ve ever heard the song “Tie Me Kangaroo Down, Sport,” the Australian doggerel with the marginally racist lyrics, that was written by Harris. The Australian-born singer and artist established himself as a “national treasure” here in Britain with his children’s TV shows and BBC specials on art. He even famously made a painting of the Queen.

It turned out Harris was a loathsome, practising paedophile, and to make a long story short he was sentenced to five years and nine months in prison on twelve counts of indecent assault on four female victims. He was 84 years old when he began his prison term.

Uncharacteristically he survived prison and lived to see the sky again. He died a “free” man this year on the 10th of May at the age of 94. But he lived his final years of freedom in disgraced obscurity. Whenever he was recognised in public he was booed and chased away. He didn’t dare show his famous face in public.

So there you are, an instance where a “civilised” country sent an elderly man to prison without even batting an eye. The MAGA crowd will scream and wail and cry about it, but the fact remains Trump will almost certainly go to prison, even if the judge is Aileen Cannon.

There has been much speculation surrounding the random appointment of Judge Cannon. There is cause for concern, but not undue alarm. As you may recall, Cannon presided over Donald J. Trump v. United States of America (case no. 22-81294-CIV-CANNON). That case was a lawsuit filed by Trump himself. He sought the appointment of a special master to review materials seized on August 8, 2022, during the FBI search of Mar-a-Lago, a part of the investigation that led to Trump’s most recent indictment.

Normally such a suit would be thrown out as a matter of course. Cannon, a MAGA nutjob, did as her own special master dictated, and ordered the DOJ to halt its review of all materials.

This resulted in a short delay in proceedings at the end of which Judge Cannon received a significant official smackdown. Her disgraceful interference on Trump’s behalf was brought to an abrupt end and the judge was officially and properly humiliated for abusing her discretion.

Now, a “rigged” system would hardly appoint this idiot as Trump’s trial judge and the person who will ultimately decide his fate, right? Whatever kind of landing Trump has at the end of it, you can bet that if Judge Cannon is still in charge she will give him the softest one she possibly can get away with.

Assuming Cannon remains as judge, she will preside over the jury selection, deciding who is appropriate and who is not to make the final judgement on whether or not the prosecution has met its burden of proof. Throughout the trial she will decide what is admissible as evidence and what is not.

The honourable thing for her to do would be for the judge to recuse herself. But there I go, using the word “honourable” as a potential adjective for a MAGA whack-job. Barring that, the DOJ can file a recusal motion to have her recused. If that fails (and most recusal motions usually do) the DOJ can appeal. If that fails she will be watched, and the slightest move betraying bias will be vigorously assailed.

It’s a shame that this idiot was picked for the most important job on earth right now. Whether or not she takes it depends on how much public shame she is willing to endure. We will have to wait and see. And, as ever, ladies and gentlemen, brothers and sisters, comrades and friends, stay safe.