National Joke

| 12:01 pm EDT September 14, 2023
Dear Palmer Report readers, we all understand the difficult era we're heading into. Major media outlets are caving to Trump already. Even the internet itself and publishing platforms may be at risk. But Palmer Report is nonetheless going to lead the fight. We're funding our 2025 operating expenses now, so we can keep publishing no matter what happens. I'm asking you to contribute if you can, because the stakes are just so high. You can donate here.

The reason I frequently use metaphors related to horror when writing about Republicans, is that THAT’S what comes to mind when I think about them. The Republican Party is one great big, decaying, creepy-as-heck horror movie. Watching the GOP movie brings forth a sick kind of fascination that any one group could be such morons.

But few things have been creepier (nor as hilarious) as what occurred the other day between two of the stars of the horror movie that will not end. You see, the GOP is a horror show. But they’re not SCARY in and of themselves. What they are is sort of a “so bad it’s good” type of horror show.

So, as you know, Kevin McCarthy is a hostage of the alt-right. And his chickens are coming home to roost as the miserable ghouls that own him demand their payment. Is there any human on earth who welcomes humiliation as fervently as Kevin McCarthy? No, as the following will prove to you.

Matt Gaetz has Kevin’s person firmly grasped between his obnoxious hands, and he made that clear the other day in what he said live on TV to the wretched non-speaker of the house.

“Out of compliance!” That is exactly what Matt said Kevin was, leaving no doubt who runs the show, the horror show, and it certainly isn’t Kevin. “It’s put up or shut up time,” Gaetz said coldly.

Gaetz is dying to make a motion to vacate the chair. You can see it in him. He LOATHES McCarthy, and I’ve no doubt that motion will come, whether it’s tomorrow or four months from now.

Gaetz has an itch he wants to scratch, and that is — humiliating McCarthy — over and over and over again. McCarthy is now a national joke, a laughing stock. Even The View got in on the fun, asking: “Is there anything more pathetic than Kevin McCarthy?”

Can one imagine how McCarthy feels? I’m starting to enjoy the horror show a little. Joy Behar made a statement that I loved. Here it is: “Can you imagine anyone in Congress speaking to Nancy Pelosi like that?”

“She would smack them down in two seconds.” Indeed, she would, which is why Nancy is one of the best Speakers EVER. And Kevin is definitely one of the worst.

He’s that potential victim in the horror film who KNOWS where the psychos and monsters are and, instead of running, decides to go look for them.

And all because of a dream he had, which was a false dream anyway because being the Speaker was never going to give Kev the happiness he sought. He should have looked within himself for that joy — maybe tried helping his constituents.

There is nothing like the joy of giving. Kevin only takes. And so I feel naught for him — no sorrow, nothing. This horror movie will go on for awhile as Gaetz and other monsters taunt Kevin and play with him for a while before the final devouring occurs.

Dear Palmer Report readers, we all understand the difficult era we're heading into. Major media outlets are caving to Trump already. Even the internet itself and publishing platforms may be at risk. But Palmer Report is nonetheless going to lead the fight. We're funding our 2025 operating expenses now, so we can keep publishing no matter what happens. I'm asking you to contribute if you can, because the stakes are just so high. You can donate here.