Mike Pence saddles up with the Gang of Losers

| 10:00 pm EDT April 23, 2023
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It’s a big few days in Hawkeye State! This weekend it’s all about Iowa. This is because Republican presidential hopefuls are heading there for the “Faith and Freedom” gathering. I must stop here to suppress a rather hysterical giggle I feel bubbling up. Just look at the name of this gathering: FAITH AND FREEDOM.

The GOP’s faith resides in marginalizing anyone they deem different from them, and their ideas of freedom are non-existent. But still — this is the name of the event which beckons to them like the neon sign of a roadside inn beckons to an exhausted driver.

So yes, Iowa will be all-abuzz with faith and freedom. So whom does the guest list include? Many ambitious Republicans. Let’s take each one name by name. Tim Scott will be hanging out there. Scott, who already bungled one of his first interviews by babbling incomprehensibly about what to do about abortion, stands little chance of winning. But it’s important to see and to be seen! And our Timmy is wasting no time doing just that.

Moving on, we come to Asa Hutchinson. Yes, the former Arkansas governor announced he’s in. Did anybody hear him? That remains to be seen.

Mike Pence will be there. Like a sad leaf falling from a decaying tree, Pence will undoubtedly be hoping he gets applause, not boos, as he did at the NRA convention. Poor Mikey! Hopefully, at least, he will be able to enjoy some good corn.

DeSantis was invited but word is he will be a no-show. Now why do you suppose that is? Could he be chasing Mickey again? I believe that this is possible. Or perhaps the governor has gradually realized he is repulsing everyone around him and that for his own presidential ambitions sake, it might be better not to be seen or heard this time.

Trump will appear by video. Undoubtedly he will rant and rave about his enemies, showing he has no faith and that, come more indictments, he will also have few freedoms left. So that’s what’s going in in Iowa this week! It promises to be an interesting event, filled with GOP losers sizing up the competition. How utterly boring this event will be.

Dear Palmer Report readers, we all understand the difficult era we're heading into. Major media outlets are caving to Trump already. Even the internet itself and publishing platforms may be at risk. But Palmer Report is nonetheless going to lead the fight. We're funding our 2025 operating expenses now, so we can keep publishing no matter what happens. I'm asking you to contribute if you can, because the stakes are just so high. You can donate here.