Marjorie Taylor Greene’s spy ring

| 12:01 pm EDT June 26, 2023
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Turn your televisions off now! People, don’t ask questions! Just do it! Turn them off! There’s a monster behind your television, and it just might have its eyes on YOU. No, this isn’t the movie “The Ring.” This is real life! Your television set is spying on you! There might be people inside it watching your every move! I know this because Marjorie Taylor Greene says so!

Yes readers, surely you know there is no need to turn off your TVs. Surely you know that Marjorie Taylor Greene is starved for attention as she hasn’t been getting enough of it lately.

And perhaps that’s why she’s announced her television screen is spying on her. Greene has declared that her TV is doing surveillance on her. The boob tube has apparently turned on by itself in Greene’s home, prompting the Georgia troll to speak out about the fact that she’s a victim of television spying. You just can’t make this shit up.

Greene said that someone showed up inside the TV and that someone’s laptop was seen trying to connect to her television. Could it have been Hunter Biden? Nah, that ship has sailed. Perhaps Lauren Boebert is haunting her. This I could see. Can you picture cackles of Boebert laughter coming from within the TV set? One never knows, does one?

Or perhaps it’s Jack Smith! Perhaps Jack’s slithered his way into the TV and sat there just waiting for Greene to turn on the set. The other theory is Greene is insane. I like that one. Continuing on with her delusions, Greene says she eats well, doesn’t smoke, and exercises. If you’re wondering what that has to do with a haunted TV, congrats. You are not alone.

One Twitter user suggested it was Santa Claus coming to check if the screaming harridan had been naughty or nice. Others just suggested she calls a computer tech. And still others did the correct thing and laughed their heads off.

Dear Palmer Report readers, we all understand the difficult era we're heading into. Major media outlets are caving to Trump already. Even the internet itself and publishing platforms may be at risk. But Palmer Report is nonetheless going to lead the fight. We're funding our 2025 operating expenses now, so we can keep publishing no matter what happens. I'm asking you to contribute if you can, because the stakes are just so high. You can donate here.