Impeachment has shattered what little was left of Donald Trump’s brain

| 2:00 pm EST December 20, 2019
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Donald Trump has just been impeached, his poll numbers are so bad that he’s not currently in contention for 2020, and he’s facing the prospect of immediate arrest by New York State once he’s no longer in office. Yet instead of trying to find a way to improve his increasingly precarious position, all Trump seems to care about at this point is petty revenge against the isolated targets he blames for his downfall.

So far this month Donald Trump has made a point of viciously attacking a teenage girl, a widow, and a deceased Congressman. Now Trump is attacking ET. At least this time he’s doing it by accident, which makes it… better? We’re not sure anymore. Trump was trying to attack a far-right evangelical publication called Christianity Today, which yesterday called for his removal from office on moral grounds. Trump tweeted this unfortunate missive:

A far left magazine, or very “progressive,” as some would call it, which has been doing poorly and hasn’t been involved with the Billy Graham family for many years, Christianity Today, knows nothing about reading a perfect transcript of a routine phone call and would rather have a Radical Left nonbeliever, who wants to take your religion & your guns, than Donald Trump as your President. No President has done more for the Evangelical community, and it’s not even close. You’ll not get anything from those Dems on stage. I won’t be reading ET again!

There are so many things wrong here, we’re not sure where to start. Donald Trump is accusing the Democratic 2020 candidates of being atheists, which is a lie. He shouldn’t be attacking them for being atheists, even if they were atheists. “Christianity Today” is definitely not a far left magazine. And no one has ever taken two words that begin with “C” and “T” and abbreviated them with “ET.” It’s time for Trump to phone home.