Dumpster fire alert!

| 12:01 pm EDT September 12, 2024
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“It’s fixin to be a shitshow.” Those words are reportedly from Alabama Rep. Jerry Carl, who was speaking about averting a Government shutdown. You may have heard a bit of the frenzied whispers from hapless Republicans lately. You see, my dear readers, the calls come from inside the House again.

These calls are reporting — : nothing but static. You see, Republicans are squabbling as the government needs to be funded, and as usual, the bunch of incompetent GOP House members can’t agree on how to GET it funded. To fund or not to fund — that IS the question.

Right now, the feuding is primarily white noise. Nobody has a plan, although many suggest foolish ideas on what to do.

Like the following:

Fund the government for six months ONLY if the SAVE Act is passed.

What’s that, you may ask.

It’s legislation created by Republicans that “guts the protections of the National Voter Registration Act by requiring proof of citizenship for anyone registering to vote.”

Ah — now you get it, I’m sure. Of course, this is about voting! What else could it POSSIBLY be about? It’s about voting — and cheating, the ONLY thing the GOP seems to devote time to. All experts agree that this legislation is not necessary. And there is another issue. They don’t even have the votes from their own team! As of this writing, at least seven Republicans don’t like this bill, and the GOP cannot lose more than four votes.

But there’s another issue! Some Republicans want to shut down the government no matter what — for the thrill of it all, I suppose. But wait! There’s ANOTHER problem! That problem is orange in color and flavor, and is a convicted felon. Trump has once again interjected himself into talks. Trump wants the government shut down unless this anti-voter legislation is passed, which certainly won’t happen. The House does not have the votes, and the Senate would never let it pass.

What timing! You know, Republicans should be proud of themselves. They are like bloodhounds, always sniffing out ways to humiliate themselves and hasten failure. It is a special skill they seem to have. Better figure out SOMETHING soon, Einsteins! There’s an election coming up, and I don’t think shutting down the government is a good way to get votes.