Donald Trump is all wet

So, you know, little things like your sink.”

“When you take a shower, I like to have, you know.”

“I have this gorgeous head of hair.”

“When I take a shower.”

“I want water to pour down on me.”

“When you go into these new homes with showers, the water drips down slowly.”

“Slowly you’d have suds. Beautiful, nice, wonderful suds.”

This intellectually stimulating speech took place at the South Carolina Silver Elephant gala over the weekend. And those words of brilliance were spoken by none other than Donald Trump. Bad plumbing seemed uppermost on the traitor’s mind as he waxed poetic about the beauty of soapsuds and showers where the water pours down upon you.

“Little things like your sink.”

Wow. That’s a way to win if ever I saw it.

“It takes you ten minutes to wash your hair.”

Who knew Donald Trump enjoyed soapsuds so much? Not me.

“I opened up your sinks!!”

Of course, no speech by Trump could finish without the traitor talking about himself. And he did as you just saw. He bragged about how good plumbing was under his leadership and said under his direction, sinks were restored to their proper working order.

I am deeply sorry America that this thing was the President. I take issue with a lot of what Trump said, particularly his “gorgeous head of hair.” I do not see Trump’s hair as being at all attractive. In fact it reminds me of a giant , very unatttractive Bell Pepper but that’s just me. Perhaps I am missing something.

All this talk of sinks and sudsy showers was very odd. Perhaps Trump has run out of things to talk about and is now zeroing in on plumbers and soap. And the fact is Trump did nothing to improve water efficiency. If I remember correctly, he repealed water standards.

I do think we’ve gotten to the point where trump just goes off on whatever thought flashes through his head at the current moment. And this weekend it was soapsuds. Lots of soapsuds. Who is going to tell him that in prison, he will have LESS time to wash his hair than ever before?