Dean Phillips just imploded

Dear Palmer Report readers,

We all understand what a dark era we're heading into. Journalists will be prosecuted. Major media outlets are caving to Trump already. Even the internet itself and publishing platforms may be at risk. Advertising networks can't be counted on. But Palmer Report is nonetheless going to lead the fight, because someone has to.

In that regard we're looking to start funding our 2025 operating expenses now, so we can keep publishing no matter what happens or how dark things get. We've launched a reader supported fund, and we've already raised $3360 and counting. I'm asking you to contribute if you can, because the stakes are just so high. You can contribute here. Thank you in advance.
Sincerely,
Bill Palmer
Palmer Report

When Dean Phillips jumped into the Presidential race, I immediately knew it was a political suicide mission. Phillips elected not to run for reelection for his own seat, instead following the lying stars in his eyes, which twinkled with mischief as Phillips, wrapped in a cloak of Hubris, not unlike the one worn by virtually ALL Republicans, threw his already failing hat in the ring.

And things have gone pretty much the way we thought they would. In the scant time he’s been a candidate, Dean has:

– Held events in which nobody showed up.

– Been clobbered by President Biden in state elections.

– Humiliated himself by getting a whopping one percent in the South Carolina primary.

– Has been investigated for voter fraud.

Wow. That’s some campaign you’re running there, Phillips! But now there is some news about dimwitted Dean. The non-candidate may at long last have finally gotten a clue because Dean Phillips has just laid off most of his campaign staff.

By George, I think he’s got it! Dean announced that “sadly” he’d be laying off staff members. Now, Dean reiterated that he is staying in the race. There’s only one problem with that announcement. There IS no race.

I admit it has been great fun watching this fool humiliate himself over and over again. I imagine it might take Dean a bit of time to come to terms with the fact that he ruined his own career for absolutely no good reason at all.

“Today, sadly I had to announce layoffs to a lot of my staff members” he declared — on TWITTER of all places. You do not want to go on Dean’s page to read the responses. Trust me, you DO NOT want to do that.

However — since I am the writer of this cheery article, allow me to share some extra-special witty responses with you. As you might expect, some were pretty brutal. Note: All quotes are written as is; typos are included:

“You made a fool out of yourself.”

“Ego over country.”

“WHAT THE HELL HAS HE BEEN SMOKING?”

Nopity nope.”

“Dude, you suck.”

“Clean up your mess, then disappear.”

“Dean is like that ex-boyfriend who can’t take no for an answer.”

“Dude – go in the woods to knit or something. You’re pathetic.”

“Oh, honey. It’s not the party. It’s you.”

“Biden is ten times the man you are.”

“Dean, we ‘re just not that into you.”

“Dean WHO?”

“Delusional egomaniac.”

“You’ve given me some good laughs, but that’s it.”

“Dropout. ass. hole.

“would you please let go of your ego?”

As you can see, one thing came out of Dean’s campaign. That thing is that absolutely nobody wants him. Good luck Dean, on ever getting anyone to take you seriously ever again.

Dear Palmer Report readers,

We all understand what a dark era we're heading into. Journalists will be prosecuted. Major media outlets are caving to Trump already. Even the internet itself and publishing platforms may be at risk. Advertising networks can't be counted on. But Palmer Report is nonetheless going to lead the fight, because someone has to.

In that regard we're looking to start funding our 2025 operating expenses now, so we can keep publishing no matter what happens or how dark things get. We've launched a reader supported fund, and we've already raised $3360 and counting. I'm asking you to contribute if you can, because the stakes are just so high. You can contribute here. Thank you in advance.
Sincerely,
Bill Palmer
Palmer Report