Donald Trump has completely berserk Christmas Day meltdown

| 9:30 pm EST December 25, 2019
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For awhile there, it looked like criminal fugitive Donald Trump was going to leave us all alone today and let us enjoy Christmas. But then Trump remembered that he’s Trump, and that he’s being impeached for his crimes, and that he’s on track to lose in 2020, and that he’s going to prison if he loses. By Christmas afternoon, Trump was doing what he does best: tweeting poorly.

Donald Trump began ranting about California Governor Gavin Newsom, whose last name he’s apparently afraid to even try to spell: “Governor Gavin N has done a really bad job on taking care of the homeless population in California. If he can’t fix the problem, the Federal Govt. will get involved!” Of course Trump has absolutely no intention of helping the homeless; he’s merely attacking a liberal state that he knows he isn’t going to win in 2020 anyway. But Trump was just getting started.

Trump went on an all-caps bender about how 2019 holiday retail sales were “UP 3.4% FROM LAST YEAR, THE BIGGEST NUMBER IN U.S. HISTORY.” But it took internet sleuths just a few moments to track down the real numbers and prove that these numbers don’t set any sort of record. Trump also yelled “It’s all a giant SCAM” at one point, seemingly unaware that he was describing his own illegitimate presidency in the process.

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