So the Pee Pee Tape is real

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Even as Donald Trump’s endless criminal scandals and the corresponding criminal investigations have played out, one question has remained in the back of everyone’s mind: is there really a Pee Pee Tape? Did Russia truly set Trump up with prostitutes in a Moscow hotel room so it could film him and use it for political blackmail? Thanks to newly revealed details originating from Trump’s own mouth, we now know it is real.

How can we be so confident? Former FBI Director James Comey is asserting in his new book that during a conversation with Donald Trump early last year, Trump told Comey he was considering having the FBI investigate the Pee Pee Tape to prove it wasn’t real. The key here is that Trump didn’t actually instruct Comey to investigate it; he merely said he was considering instructing him to do it. Late night host Seth Meyers did the best job of explaining the logic last night of why this means the tape is very much real.

Here’s how Meyers put it: “Why would you ask the FBI director to investigate a pee tape if you knew for a fact that pee tape definitely didn’t exist? That’s like me saying, ‘Can you make sure there isn’t a tape of me in 1994 doing Thunder Road at karaoke and then barfing and then slipping on the barf and farting?'” Meyers asserted that “Oh my god, it’s real.”

Seth Meyers is right. Donald Trump is so obsessed with the Pee Pee Tape that he tried to declare his innocence by telling the FBI Director he wanted him to investigate it, but then ultimately didn’t have him investigate it. It’s not that there was much remaining doubt as it is. So much of the Trump-Russia dossier has been proven, and none of it disproven, that it’s now fair to consider the entire document legitimate – including the Pee Pee Tape claim. But Trump’s antics with Comey just gave away that it is real after all. Update: McClatchy now says Mueller has evidence that Cohen was in Prague in 2016 after all. So yeah, the Pee Pee Tape is real.