Senile Donald Trump gets confused during rally speech, starts talking about Arnold Palmer’s dick

| 6:42 pm EDT October 19, 2024
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Donald Trump is so deep into cognitive decline, his babysitters keep canceling his campaign events. When they do let him appear in public, it’s a reminder of why they’re limiting his public appearances. Trump recently spent a town hall standing there swaying to music instead of taking questions. He abruptly ended a recent interview. And now Trump is, well, how do we say this?

During an attempt at a rally speech today, Trump forgot why he was there and instead began telling a story about the late golfing legend Arnold Palmer. About ten minutes into the story, Trump began talking glowingly about how impressive Arnold Palmer’s dick was. No really, this happened:
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We’ve said that at the rate Trump is declining, it won’t be much longer before he takes his pants off on stage. He’s clearly getting closer to that. He’s up there talking about a dead golfer’s genitals. It’s a short trip from here to a padded cell.