Pot meet kettle…

What do you call it when two miraculously vile, stupid, racist men get together to disparage people they don’t know, trash books they never read and opine on socio-political milieus they barely comprehend? Why, you call it an interview of Donald Trump by the notorious British rapscallion Nigel Farage, of course.

Trump is currently visiting Britain, ostensibly to visit his golf courses but in reality to try (and fail) to upstage Joe Biden’s recent and wildly successful visit to these islands. Wherever he goes Trump attracts bad guys the way faeces attract flies. The fly in question is the aforementioned Nigel Farage. For those of you who don’t know him, Farage was a former leader of the UK Independent Party (UKIP) and, briefly, a former commentator on Fox News.

UKIP is the party for Brits who prefer their racism barely-disguised. Back in 2016, and as head of UKIP, Farage convinced UKIP members and a whole lot of other stupid people in the United Kingdom that Brexit (the vote for the withdrawal of the UK from the European Union) would be a good idea. A slim margin passed Brexit, and the relatively smart ones have regretted it ever since.

Farage has spent his time since hiding from his victims, much of it in the United States. He returned to Britain to host a Sunday morning political discussion programme called “The Political Correction” on GB News, Britain’s own brand of Fox News.

In his interview with Farage, the disgraced, twice-impeached rapist hit out at Prince Harry and Meghan Markle for being “disrespectful” to the late Queen Elizabeth II. Trump said he was “surprised” Harry was invited to King Charles’s coronation after writing his tell all book “Spare,” which Trump called a “just horrible” book. A remarkable comment from a man who quite possibly has never read a book in his life.

Trump also said he would end the Ukraine war in “one day” if he were re-elected president. One recalls similarly miraculous predictions: he would build a wall on America’s southern border in three months and have Mexico pay for it. He would come up with a “beautiful” alternative to the Affordable Care Act. He would devise a “perfect” infrastructure plan in “two weeks.” And so on.

Trump gave no details of how he would end the war in Ukraine. One way that would be bizarrely popular with much of the MAGA crowd would be by supplying the Russians with enough weapons to defeat the nation they unlawfully invaded more than a year ago. Another way would be for Trump to order the US military to attack Ukraine himself. After all, Trump has never forgiven Volodymyr Zelenskyy for refusing to submit to his blackmail and to announce an investigation into Joe Biden and his hapless son Hunter.

Trump also accused Boris Johnson of turning “far-left” while in office. What Trump meant by that was Boris hurt his brittle feelings by snubbing him and privately disparaging him. Boris Johnson’s idea of turning left is to make three right turns. But calling Boris a lefty is the biggest insult that Trump’s limited vocabulary can summon on short notice.

There were no other surprises. Trump remains a bitter and stupid man under 34 criminal counts (and more to come), a rapist being sued for defamation and the most justly hated man on earth, doubly so here. He is always the same, no different in Britain than he is in the United States.

Trump has no message to bring anyone beyond his usual inarticulate diatribes. He never has anything new to say. Trump’s central raison d’etre is to spread disunity between Democrats and Republicans, boast about himself and generally call kettles black wherever he goes. He will go back to the United States soon and I, for one, will be happy to no longer share this graceful little island with that most evil, aggrieved, rancorous and stupid man. And, as ever, ladies and gentlemen, brothers and sisters, comrades and friends, stay safe.