This is Jim Jordan’s worst nightmare

It’s often relatively easy to tell when someone is lying. There are “tells.” Their voices quiver and shake. They might not be able to look their questioner in the eye. They act — twitchy.

See, the thing about lying is one always has to remember their lies. They must adopt the proper facial expression, the right tone to their voices, muster a mask of earnest sincerity. And some liars fail miserably. Two words come to mind on that score: GYM JORDAN.

Gym may be in the running for the worst liar in politics. Seriously folks — the dude has FINALLY found, after all this time, something he really excels at. I’m sure you all remember his public meltdown when questioned about whether he spoke to Trump on January 6.

His answer went something like this: “Uh.” And then again: “Uh.” This continued for many minutes. Gym could not find sincerity. I suspect that’s because they’ve never met, and if they had sincerity would have abandoned the Ohio moron in absolute disgust.

And now, per CNN, Gym’s babble has come back to bite him in the — wherever. Per CNN, the January 6 committee now has the call records of calls between Assolini and Gym. And CNN sources say that the two idiots did indeed have a chat on the morning of January 6. Uh-oh.

The call lasted about ten minutes. Jordan has changed his “uh” story repeatedly about whether the two spoke that morning and, when asked most recently, claimed he could not remember if had. Right.

Gym also added: “I don’t recall.” Remember those words. “I don’t recall” almost always means “I’m guilty as f### but I ain’t talking.” Of course, now the committee has even more reason to subpoena Gym Jordan. What was that call about?

What words were said? Perhaps they talked about the sound of birdies singing outside the White House. Maybe the conversation was about splitting a pizza or some chicken nuggets.

I very much doubt that. These missing words have to be put back together just like the ripped documents in the National Archives were. As for Gym — he’s doing nothing except making a further ass of himself and showing the American people that lying and Gym Jordan are indeed best friends.