Donald Trump doesn’t have a prayer

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It’s common for people to pray for their preferred candidate in an election or team in a sporting event. While we can disagree about the power, purpose and even the validity of prayer, one thing is clear: if you’re praying for a certain outcome after failing spectacularly to obtain it, then you’re probably not doing well.

After losing last month at the polls, Donald Trump has added insult to injury by failing again in a humiliatingly bizarre, cretin-over-country attempt to get courts and state legislators to overturn a legitimate blowout election. Despite Trump’s endless series of flops, people are stepping up prayer efforts in the hope of somehow turning things around.

An online event called “Global Prayer for U.S. Election Integrity” has been meeting regularly, allegedly attracting up to 10,000 worldwide listeners. As co-host Mario Bramnick explained, “We are praying to expose the clear election fraud. It is clear that President Trump won… but that extensive, wide fraud was committed on behalf of Biden.”

Disgraced former national security advisor Michael Flynn appeared as the featured guest at Wednesday night’s meeting as the ink was still drying on his pardon. According to reporting from Right Wing Watch, Flynn urged listeners to pray for the “incredibly brave patriots” who have been alleging voting irregularities under supposed threats and intimidation.

Conspiracy theorist and Roger Stone associate Jerome Corsi went on Chaplain Gordon James Klingenschmitt’s online show to plug the Jericho March, a series of prayer events aimed at “taking back America,” according to a press release. “I think that God and Jesus Christ are not going to let this election be stolen provided we pray,” he insisted. Corsi also claimed it’s still “lock-solid” and a “no-brainer” that Trump wins “if you understand the law,” just before admitting he is not a lawyer.

Former GOP representative Michele Bachmann, who got into trouble in 2011 after secret videos revealed her clinic tried to convert gay people to straight through prayer, is seeking new relevancy by suggesting prayer will give Trump another four years. She has released her own video now with this direct request: “Lord, would you allow Donald Trump to have a second term as President of the United States?”

The great irony here is that all this praying is aimed at helping someone who thinks it’s as real as the bone spurs in his heels. In his recent book, Disloyal, Trump’s former fixer Michael Cohen recalled when prominent evangelical leaders laid their hands on his boss in prayer during the 2016 campaign. Trump allegedly told Cohen, “Can you believe that bullshit? Can you believe people believe that bullshit?”

Next month, Joe Biden will get sworn in as the 46th President of the United States while his predecessor will be frantically trying to avoid prison. Biden won by obtaining a 306-232 Electoral College victory and a popular vote lead of over 7 million votes, having earned more votes than any presidential candidate in American history. Trump, on the other hand, doesn’t have a prayer.