Rudy Giuliani goes completely bonkers after John Bolton sells him out

| 4:10 pm EDT October 15, 2019
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Just how badly do you have to screw up your criminal scandal for John Bolton to end up playing the role of the good guy? That’s the question that Donald Trump and Rudy Giuliani are now pondering, after Fiona Hill’s testimony yesterday to the House impeachment inquiry revealed that Bolton made sure the Trump-Rudy antics in Ukraine were being documented by National Security Council lawyers.

John Bolton referred to the Ukraine extortion scandal as a “drug deal” and accused Rudy Giuliani of being a “hand grenade” who was going to take them all down. In response, Rudy is acting like, well, a hand grenade. Rudy said this to NBC News today about Bolton: “I’m very disappointed that his bitterness drives him to attack a friend falsely.” Wait, he’s disappointed? That’s all he’s got?

Nope, there’s more. Rudy Giuliani also told NBC that John Bolton is “described by many as an atomic bomb.” That’s right, Rudy’s new legal defense is essentially, “I know you are but what am I?” No wonder Rudy’s new attorney flew the coop today after just two weeks on the job. Can you even give you two weeks notice if you quit after just two weeks?

In all seriousness, Rudy Giuliani is completely hosed. Yesterday federal investigators revealed to the media that they’ve already sifted through Rudy’s bank records. This was a clear signal to Rudy that they have him nailed, and that he should cut a plea deal while he still can. Instead, Rudy responded by confessing that he’d taken half a million dollars from a Ukrainian company run by one of the two guys who was arrested last week. This just keeps getting dumber.